Oh… I’m sorry to hear it, because this feels terrible.
[He falls silent, burying any other thoughts. Then he disappears from the chair, only to reappear a foot or so behind her; Something preluded by the sound of his belt hitting the floor, followed by the careful placement of his feet.]
… I know that you really hate it here and you want to go back. But um.
Thank you for being here… and meeting me. You’re going to say it could have been anyone, but even if that’s true… I’m grateful that my first friend could be you.
[He can hear how left field that must sound when she doesn’t know what thoughts are racing through his head. Yuuto keeps his back turned, though he’s calculating an exit.]
I just want for you to remember that, please.
Edited (Ugh Autumn and I almost did a typo free mobile tag) 2023-01-15 11:39 (UTC)
He turns around to smile and laugh, as if to negate her words. And as he does, her computer dings to inform her that it’s safe to remove the flashdrive, and said flashdrive floats towards her.]
That’s because it is! I want to give this to you.
Because if Ryoko or Akutagawa have it, they’ll never use it… but if it really was the end, and I was going to become something that hurt them, then you would. Right? You have people to protect. People who miss you so much.
I want you to do everything that you can to go back to them. Promise me? Please?
[ She can't look at him. Instead, her gaze falls - she doesn't know what expression she's making and she can almost feel the crackle in her throat as her grip on the flash drive tightens in her hands.
This doesn't feel like something that she she should be happy about.
How could she happy about being given a wedge to drive the knife in deep; a weapon that she desperately doesn't want to use? She can't smile like he can. She doesn't even want to bother pretending to be even remotely okay with this.
"I want you to do everything that you can to go back to them."
Those words echo and reverberate in her mind and she realizes that this... feels like she's been handed down a curse. Something stings in her eyes and it's only after what feels like forever that she finally speaks. ]
I...
[ What the hell? Before, she was so confident that she'd be able to do it if anything went wrong. Why is she stumbling on her two feet now?
Ah.
So she has to be-- ]
Alright. If it means that I have to become the bad guy later down the line, fine.
[ After all, saying yes to this promise...
Is saying 'yes' to becoming a potential murderer. ]
[Yuuto’s attempt to be cheerful falters. He looks confused and worried again, even as instinct tells him that he needs to smile or he’ll start crying. He doesn’t want to leave Rumor tears on her floor.
He shakes his head lightly and reaches for the hand with the flashdrive, silently offering to take it back if necessary. But also, selfishly, wanting some contact from his friend to keep himself brave and resolute.]
You won’t be the villain though… You’ll be the hero, right? Saving everyone from a selfish monster… Who was too scared to do it himself. Won’t everyone be happier this way?
[His smile is wavering more. He doesn’t like to think that this will make people happy, but he also has to think it. Otherwise this is sad.]
It worried me. Your dream. Everyone else that I visited brought themselves to their friends and loved ones, or went ‘home.’ And you stayed here and saved everyone… That scared me. Because I know how much you miss everyone. I don’t want for you to be hurting, Inaba. I’m sorry… I don’t want to be worried and… ‘gone.’
[He tilts his head, but his voice is the one to crack this time despite the smile he’s so desperate to keep in place,] Won’t this make the most people happy?
[ She doesn't raise her head. But she doesn't let him take back the flash drive, either, pulling her hand away. ]
The ordinary citizen might think that, sure. But... all the Fallen Stars will come to hate me.
[ Her voice continues to be serious - like she's sunken into that deep pit. She doesn't know if Yuuto's death would let her go back home. What if she's just stuck here still? What if it forces those who don't want to go back home to return?
...what if people who were dead go back to being dead?
That'd be her fault.
She doesn't know if she'd be able to live through the guilt. ]
I don't know if it'd make the most people happy. There's no guarantees. My dream wasn't to save myself. It was only to... change this world for the better. I'm not sure that I'd be as unhappy as I was in the dream. But maybe the dream was a bit of a premonition.
[ Inaba places her hand to her chest. ]
Something that the Narrator wrote for me. A warning, basically.
I've always worried. What happens if I go back? The end of my story... the last scene I'm seen in. Is during a Christmas party, during my third year. I don't get to see myself graduate. If I go home, I'm cut off from the Narrator's words... I'll lose all the things that I learned in the Foundation, and I'd return to the real author. And then there'll be nothing left.
Then I won't let it come to that. This is just a back-up, you know? I really don't want to...
[He doesn't want to die. Especially not as a Distortion. From the way it's been described to him, becoming a Distortion is going to be agonizing. It won't just hurt, but it'll distort every thought and feeling that makes him 'Yuuto.' The flashdrive, which will shape him according to the Rumor he's devised on those files, will at least let him die as 'Yuuto.'
But he doesn't want to talk about it either. It doesn't take a genius to see that they're both hurting. And he's always been more interested in Inaba and her happiness than his own.]
If I may... There's something that I noticed. May I say it? I'm not sure you'll like it, but um... Maybe it'll help?
[The way he lets that hang in the air for a second does imply some reluctance. Yuuto won't go into the specifics without prompting. Instead he repeats his earlier point:]
Uh so... My other ex. They... could probably help you. [he feels sick suggesting this. please don't catch on, inaba:] If Satou-san asked for them to visit, they would probably come.
[Yuuto visibly sulks. He doesn’t want to tell Inaba the specifics.]
Anyway. Wh-What I’m saying is just… Don’t give up. You taught me to fight my fate. Don’t be a hypocrite on purpose. I’ll do really gross things to help you!
[He means that omnipotence and contacting his ex feel gross. He should clarify. But he’s an idiot.]
What did I say? I won’t take it back, probably! I’d do a lot of really disgusting things to help you, Inaba! Like walking through sewage or going there o-or… Or seeing Speck-San again…
[Okay. That might feel gross for a moment, but Yuuto knows deep down that he wants to see them again. Maybe that’s part of why it feels so bad.]
Well, I don’t think you’re gross. I’ve never thought that about you, even once. You’re one of the most amazing people that I’ve ever met and I’ll do my best to help you.
[There is no safe way to answer this. If he tells Inaba that he gets it, then is he saying that everything they did was gross? Is that a good thing? He kind of suspected that she hated those memories, but he doesn’t want to hear it confirmed either. He doesn’t want to imply she’s gross either. But if he says any of that, then he is going to be killed.
He stares quietly, unsure how to answer, then shakes his head.]
Then it’s settled! That’s stupid and has nothing to do with us anymore.
I’ll do anything that I can to help you. Even if I have to go talk to your narrator myself- Or if I have to bring you there to fight your own battle. I won’t ever abandon you, Inaba. If you want my help, then nothing will be allowed to kill me either. Not until you’re done with me.
[He holds up his pinky, reminding her of the promise from their dream.] I’ll do my best to make it true.
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[He falls silent, burying any other thoughts. Then he disappears from the chair, only to reappear a foot or so behind her; Something preluded by the sound of his belt hitting the floor, followed by the careful placement of his feet.]
Hey, Inaba?
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Thank you for being here… and meeting me. You’re going to say it could have been anyone, but even if that’s true… I’m grateful that my first friend could be you.
[He can hear how left field that must sound when she doesn’t know what thoughts are racing through his head. Yuuto keeps his back turned, though he’s calculating an exit.]
I just want for you to remember that, please.
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He turns around to smile and laugh, as if to negate her words. And as he does, her computer dings to inform her that it’s safe to remove the flashdrive, and said flashdrive floats towards her.]
That’s because it is! I want to give this to you.
Because if Ryoko or Akutagawa have it, they’ll never use it… but if it really was the end, and I was going to become something that hurt them, then you would. Right? You have people to protect. People who miss you so much.
I want you to do everything that you can to go back to them. Promise me? Please?
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[ She can't look at him. Instead, her gaze falls - she doesn't know what expression she's making and she can almost feel the crackle in her throat as her grip on the flash drive tightens in her hands.
This doesn't feel like something that she she should be happy about.
How could she happy about being given a wedge to drive the knife in deep; a weapon that she desperately doesn't want to use? She can't smile like he can. She doesn't even want to bother pretending to be even remotely okay with this.
"I want you to do everything that you can to go back to them."
Those words echo and reverberate in her mind and she realizes that this... feels like she's been handed down a curse. Something stings in her eyes and it's only after what feels like forever that she finally speaks. ]
I...
[ What the hell? Before, she was so confident that she'd be able to do it if anything went wrong. Why is she stumbling on her two feet now?
Ah.
So she has to be-- ]
Alright. If it means that I have to become the bad guy later down the line, fine.
[ After all, saying yes to this promise...
Is saying 'yes' to becoming a potential murderer. ]
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He shakes his head lightly and reaches for the hand with the flashdrive, silently offering to take it back if necessary. But also, selfishly, wanting some contact from his friend to keep himself brave and resolute.]
You won’t be the villain though… You’ll be the hero, right? Saving everyone from a selfish monster… Who was too scared to do it himself. Won’t everyone be happier this way?
[His smile is wavering more. He doesn’t like to think that this will make people happy, but he also has to think it. Otherwise this is sad.]
It worried me. Your dream. Everyone else that I visited brought themselves to their friends and loved ones, or went ‘home.’ And you stayed here and saved everyone… That scared me. Because I know how much you miss everyone. I don’t want for you to be hurting, Inaba. I’m sorry… I don’t want to be worried and… ‘gone.’
[He tilts his head, but his voice is the one to crack this time despite the smile he’s so desperate to keep in place,] Won’t this make the most people happy?
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The ordinary citizen might think that, sure. But... all the Fallen Stars will come to hate me.
[ Her voice continues to be serious - like she's sunken into that deep pit. She doesn't know if Yuuto's death would let her go back home. What if she's just stuck here still? What if it forces those who don't want to go back home to return?
...what if people who were dead go back to being dead?
That'd be her fault.
She doesn't know if she'd be able to live through the guilt. ]
I don't know if it'd make the most people happy. There's no guarantees. My dream wasn't to save myself. It was only to... change this world for the better. I'm not sure that I'd be as unhappy as I was in the dream. But maybe the dream was a bit of a premonition.
[ Inaba places her hand to her chest. ]
Something that the Narrator wrote for me. A warning, basically.
I've always worried. What happens if I go back? The end of my story... the last scene I'm seen in. Is during a Christmas party, during my third year. I don't get to see myself graduate. If I go home, I'm cut off from the Narrator's words... I'll lose all the things that I learned in the Foundation, and I'd return to the real author. And then there'll be nothing left.
[ ... ]
That's just... a theory, though.
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[He doesn't want to die. Especially not as a Distortion. From the way it's been described to him, becoming a Distortion is going to be agonizing. It won't just hurt, but it'll distort every thought and feeling that makes him 'Yuuto.' The flashdrive, which will shape him according to the Rumor he's devised on those files, will at least let him die as 'Yuuto.'
But he doesn't want to talk about it either. It doesn't take a genius to see that they're both hurting. And he's always been more interested in Inaba and her happiness than his own.]
If I may... There's something that I noticed. May I say it? I'm not sure you'll like it, but um... Maybe it'll help?
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Sort of like how Speck-san did it… I don’t know if they’d answer to me, but maybe they’d come if she asked…
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[The way he lets that hang in the air for a second does imply some reluctance. Yuuto won't go into the specifics without prompting. Instead he repeats his earlier point:]
Uh so... My other ex. They... could probably help you. [he feels sick suggesting this. please don't catch on, inaba:] If Satou-san asked for them to visit, they would probably come.
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First of all. How?
And second of all: why Satou in particular...?
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Anyway. Wh-What I’m saying is just… Don’t give up. You taught me to fight my fate. Don’t be a hypocrite on purpose. I’ll do really gross things to help you!
[He means that omnipotence and contacting his ex feel gross. He should clarify. But he’s an idiot.]
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[ He's getting bonked.
Go to bonk jail, Yuuto. ]
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What did I say? I won’t take it back, probably! I’d do a lot of really disgusting things to help you, Inaba! Like walking through sewage or going there o-or… Or seeing Speck-San again…
[Okay. That might feel gross for a moment, but Yuuto knows deep down that he wants to see them again. Maybe that’s part of why it feels so bad.]
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… are you saying that you’re gross, Inaba?
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Well, I don’t think you’re gross. I’ve never thought that about you, even once. You’re one of the most amazing people that I’ve ever met and I’ll do my best to help you.
So don’t lump yourself in with sewage!
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He stares quietly, unsure how to answer, then shakes his head.]
That’s stupid.
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I’ll do anything that I can to help you. Even if I have to go talk to your narrator myself- Or if I have to bring you there to fight your own battle. I won’t ever abandon you, Inaba. If you want my help, then nothing will be allowed to kill me either. Not until you’re done with me.
[He holds up his pinky, reminding her of the promise from their dream.] I’ll do my best to make it true.
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