[ It'll actually take Karen a while to locate her because she actually went straight to visiting Dazai after the game, but later on-- ]
You say that as if it would have made a difference if someone else volunteered. Nobody in our group can tank the poison even if we diluted it even further with water -- besides, I came out just fine.
Someone had to, and I was... well, if it wasn't you, it would have been Saki-san or Mitsuru-san. I shouldn't be taking things out on you just for being the one who spoke up first.
The both of us have experienced death before, but I didn't want to push that mantle onto you when I'm the one who would deal with it a little better.
[. . .]
That isn't to say that I don't hate it- because I absolutely do. I don't like the fact that we're so "lucky" that it doesn't matter if we live or die because normally anyone can just shove our souls from death into another gigai and be done with it.
People don't normally get second chances, you know?
It's abnormal, unnatural. Hell, it might be one of the reasons why we're not seen as 'human' because, hey. We can just come back- isn't that scary? We're like living zombies.
Or machines. If your computer breaks, you just put the hard drive in a new one. And we're "manufactured," too. As far as they care, we were never really born in the first place.
With that analogy, though. . . Even if machines are broken and can be replaced, sometimes you lose things. Like important data and things like that.
Anyway, we aren't machines. Even if we're treated as fictional characters that came out of one — we have souls. The fact that we can be placed into gigai bodies at all is proof of that. We live and we breathe and we have feelings like everyone else. I don't want to see all of this as an "us" versus "them".
This world needs to change the way it thinks, because with the way they're going about this. . . They'll end up self destructing. It won't matter if any 6350 wind up hitting the highest rank and taking things over if nobody that was born in this world wants to change their thinking.
Because even if we're fictional to them, why does that even matter? Fiction has been able to impact people's lives in both the past and present.
Or things don't work quite right. [Maybe they have demon memories and feelings installed for instance.]
You don't have to tell me about the kind of impact fiction can have. [She said something about that in the final Witch confrontation, after all.] But it doesn't really matter, because real or not, we're here.
[pause]
...did that make sense? I'm sorry, I'm... I'm a bit distracted, I suppose.
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You say that as if it would have made a difference if someone else volunteered. Nobody in our group can tank the poison even if we diluted it even further with water -- besides, I came out just fine.
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Yes, even though you picked the skull cup for some reason!
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[WHY IS SHE THE ONLY ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS THIS? MOST PEOPLE CLEARLY GOT IT WITH THE PRISONER'S DILEMMA CRAP]
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that... was definitely the wrong icon
.....
........]
Well, I suppose it worked out this time.
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[ There's a bit of a pathetic, thin-veiled smile that seems to speak for itself. ]
Yeah, I guess it did. Lucky me.
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......
..........sigh.]
I'm sorry.
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[ She blinks a little bit and then raises her hands in the air. ]
N-No, you shouldn't apologize, you didn't do anything wrong-- honestly, I should be the one making an apology for volunteering again like that.
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Someone had to, and I was... well, if it wasn't you, it would have been Saki-san or Mitsuru-san. I shouldn't be taking things out on you just for being the one who spoke up first.
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[. . .]
That isn't to say that I don't hate it- because I absolutely do. I don't like the fact that we're so "lucky" that it doesn't matter if we live or die because normally anyone can just shove our souls from death into another gigai and be done with it.
People don't normally get second chances, you know?
It's abnormal, unnatural. Hell, it might be one of the reasons why we're not seen as 'human' because, hey. We can just come back- isn't that scary? We're like living zombies.
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[After a moment, she sighs again.]
Random chance, of all things.
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Anyway, we aren't machines. Even if we're treated as fictional characters that came out of one — we have souls. The fact that we can be placed into gigai bodies at all is proof of that. We live and we breathe and we have feelings like everyone else. I don't want to see all of this as an "us" versus "them".
This world needs to change the way it thinks, because with the way they're going about this. . . They'll end up self destructing. It won't matter if any 6350 wind up hitting the highest rank and taking things over if nobody that was born in this world wants to change their thinking.
Because even if we're fictional to them, why does that even matter? Fiction has been able to impact people's lives in both the past and present.
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You don't have to tell me about the kind of impact fiction can have. [She said something about that in the final Witch confrontation, after all.] But it doesn't really matter, because real or not, we're here.
[pause]
...did that make sense? I'm sorry, I'm... I'm a bit distracted, I suppose.
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[ She points in the direction of the nearest camera. ]
But you're right that it doesn't matter because we're here anyway and we've got a lot on our plates but we're not—
[ "we're not monsters" she wants to say, but she does think of herself like that in a lot of ways ]
We aren't too dissimilar, in the end.