George was right there Inaba-chan. You know I could have survived that, if I'd just...
[If he'd broken the rules. If he'd been allowed to volunteer.
But he couldn't blame 'Dazai' for that, because he knew the stakes he was playing with. He was risking his life every moment of this game, and Atsushi...
He couldn't do nearly enough.]
...It's not enough, if I can't even save the people in front of me. My ability practically lets me cheat, but it's still not enough.
[He notices the way she cuts herself off, but he's not sure what she's trying to say.]
[ Her voice raises a little bit out of frustration and her hands just ball by her sides, angry, upset.
There's so much that she wants to say, that she wants to tell him, but knows that she can't-- ]
You think I don't?! But you can't keep saying things like this! Because how do you think I feel, huh? I can't do crap. I can't save anyone, I don't have any abilities that can do anything to help other people, but you--
You have the potential to save others, to help them! Even if you couldn't do much today, that doesn't mean that it wasn't for nothing! I could have died on Wednesday because I'm helpless and weak and powerless. I can't even save myself if that cup had been filled with poison!
And there's still so much more that you can do that I just can't, Atsushi. Can't you see that?
Atsushi hadn't been thinking, about how powerless Inaba might feel, and now there's a different sort of guilt brewing in his chest. How cruel was he that he hadn't--
But she was wrong, in a way.]
Inaba-chan, you might not have an ability, but you have knowledge. You have your mind. You're clever, you're worldly, and you know so many things... You've saved us with your ability to think things through plenty of times. I don't think any of the trivia we've had to answer could have been solved without you. You've been helping save all of us. Me included.
[Atsushi knew he wasn't that knowledgeable. It was fine by him, he was learning, always learning. But he knew he tended to rely on clever people, like Dazai, Kyouka and Kunikida, Saki and Inaba.]
I-I'm sorry, though. I didn't realize.... it was thoughtless of me, to say things like that... I wasn't thinking.
[ Her shoulders sag a little bit and in the end she wears a rather bitter smile after it all. ]
To be honest, a lot of what I know is to protect myself.
[ She's so, so weak, so if she knows more information than anybody else, that's when she can actually be useful. Because otherwise, she isn't worth anything, and she knows it.
And that would make people abandon her. ]
I only know so much trivia because I had a phase and that. . . kind of didn't leave me, here.
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[If he'd broken the rules. If he'd been allowed to volunteer.
But he couldn't blame 'Dazai' for that, because he knew the stakes he was playing with. He was risking his life every moment of this game, and Atsushi...
He couldn't do nearly enough.]
...It's not enough, if I can't even save the people in front of me. My ability practically lets me cheat, but it's still not enough.
[He notices the way she cuts herself off, but he's not sure what she's trying to say.]
no subject
[ Her voice raises a little bit out of frustration and her hands just ball by her sides, angry, upset.
There's so much that she wants to say, that she wants to tell him, but knows that she can't-- ]
You think I don't?! But you can't keep saying things like this! Because how do you think I feel, huh? I can't do crap. I can't save anyone, I don't have any abilities that can do anything to help other people, but you--
You have the potential to save others, to help them! Even if you couldn't do much today, that doesn't mean that it wasn't for nothing! I could have died on Wednesday because I'm helpless and weak and powerless. I can't even save myself if that cup had been filled with poison!
And there's still so much more that you can do that I just can't, Atsushi. Can't you see that?
no subject
Atsushi hadn't been thinking, about how powerless Inaba might feel, and now there's a different sort of guilt brewing in his chest. How cruel was he that he hadn't--
But she was wrong, in a way.]
Inaba-chan, you might not have an ability, but you have knowledge. You have your mind. You're clever, you're worldly, and you know so many things... You've saved us with your ability to think things through plenty of times. I don't think any of the trivia we've had to answer could have been solved without you. You've been helping save all of us. Me included.
[Atsushi knew he wasn't that knowledgeable. It was fine by him, he was learning, always learning. But he knew he tended to rely on clever people, like Dazai, Kyouka and Kunikida, Saki and Inaba.]
I-I'm sorry, though. I didn't realize.... it was thoughtless of me, to say things like that... I wasn't thinking.
no subject
To be honest, a lot of what I know is to protect myself.
[ She's so, so weak, so if she knows more information than anybody else, that's when she can actually be useful. Because otherwise, she isn't worth anything, and she knows it.
And that would make people abandon her. ]
I only know so much trivia because I had a phase and that. . . kind of didn't leave me, here.