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[dereban]

Raina Schwarzer

"Sorry if I can't pick up right now, but if you leave a message, I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks."

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

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[dereban]

[ internal screaming ] Because it's embarrassing?! Why would I want to talk to my brother about something that embarrasses me?

[motiv8]

You certainly don't seem to have a problem with embarrassing me.

[Check, Raina.]

[dereban]

This and that are different, big brother. We are in a public restaraunt.

[motiv8]

[. . .]

Will you tell me over text, then?

[She has a point, but there is no escape.]

[dereban]

No. I refuse.

apparently i forgot to change my icon last time whoops???

[motiv8]

And yet you still expect me to cough up all my secrets to you, huh? Really not seeing how this is fair.

[dereban]

You- [...] Geez. I'll text you... But you're going to regret it. And then I'll tell you "I told you so". Okay?

[motiv8]

[The tiniest little grin. Victory.]

I'll gladly accept any and all admonishments you give me after the fact.

I won't make you do it until after this, though, if it embarrasses you that much.

[See? He's a good brother!]

[dereban]

I'll just get it over with now so I can know to never leave my room ever again.

[ Raina sighs a little defeatedly, taking her cell phone from her purse as she takes it out and quickly types out the message.

She's ready to die.

(I'm so sorry she's like this, Rean.) ]

Before he asked me out, he heard a mental thought of mine of me wanting to... do him.

1/?

[motiv8]

[Oh, well, okay. He digs his phone out of his pocket to check it, and—]

2/?

[motiv8]

3/?

[motiv8]

4/?

[motiv8]

5/?

[motiv8]

6/?

[motiv8]

7/?

[motiv8]

8/done

[motiv8]

[. . .]

At least he was polite enough to ask you out first. I... guess.

[Cough.]

[dereban]

Now you see why I didn't want to say anything? It was worse because he actually could feel the emotions associated with those thoughts...

[motiv8]

[And this is the point where he's just going to hold up his hands to ask her to stop.]

I do, I do. I really don't need to hear what happened next, thanks!

[dereban]

See? I told you so-- jeez. Anyway, can we switch topics now? Now I know how he feels admitting something like that.

[motiv8]

I heard that mumble, and I'm going to save both of us the agony and not ask.

[He can learn! As for switching topics, he sighs.]

...Well. [Talking about his memories will be a pretty abrupt mood swing, but. He has to. That's what he's here for.] Where do I even start? There's... a lot I've been having to think through recently.

I guess I'll leave it up to you. Which would you rather me talk about first: the thing that took over, or Crow?

[From his tone of voice, neither of these topics are good.]

[dereban]

Well, I wasn't going to tell you anyway!

[ Although when he does manage to switch topics, she can't help but let out a sigh to try and collect herself in hopes that at least she can listen.

Switching comes naturally to her, at least. ]

But okay. Let's go with the thing that took over, because I want to know what that is first.

[motiv8]

[Rean really never needs to know about That secret. He'd probably expire on the spot.

A sigh as he collects himself as well.]

Well... bad news is, I don't have a definitive answer for you. I'm not sure my other self quite knew what it was, either.

I remembered the first time it took over – took my other self over – right when Elliot brought us out of it. I was nine, and my past self's sister – Elise – and I got ambushed by this bear-like monster. I tried to protect her, and it nearly took me out. When I realized how much danger she'd be in if I did, I just...

blacked out.

When I came to, I'd ripped the thing to pieces. There was blood all over the snow, all over the little hatchet I'd brought to cut through branches, and all over me. Elise was crying, and it was because she was afraid of me, not the monster.

[He can't look her in the eye as he recounts all that. He manages to keep his tone more or less even, but Raina knows him better than anyone – she'll be able to pick up the way his voice just slightly wavers, how he's fidgeting, how his brows are knitting together.

He's scared.]

...The good news is that I've been meeting up with Eren. He's trying to help me learn to control it, so that what happened last time doesn't happen again.

[dereban]

... [ Raina is quiet as she listens to his recollection, and thankfully she takes it all in with a neutral expression on her features, just simply watching carefully the subtle shifts in how his voice wavers and how he seems to fidget a bit. And then she goes ahead and reaches out to him from across the table, to put a hand on his arm to tell him that she's there. She's here for him. ] Okay, so which do you want to hear from? The words from your sister or the words from a friend that is taking psychology classes?

[motiv8]

[That hand on his arm gets him to glance up, and he manages to meet her gaze as he responds.]

Ideally, my sister. That is who I came out to talk to, after all.